Texas logic

beeper*71

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Two Texas farmers, Jim and Bob, are sitting at their favorite bar,
> drinking beer.
> Jim turns to Bob and says, "You know, I'm tired of going through life
> without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the community
> college, and sign up for some classes."
> Bob thinks it's a good idea, and the two leave. The next day, Jim goes

> down to the college and meets Dean of Admissions, who signs him up
> for the four basic classes: Math, English, history, and Logic.
> "Logic?" Jim says. "What's that?"
> The dean says, "I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?"
> "Yeah." "Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I
> think that you would have a yard."
> "That's true, I do have a yard."
> "I'm not done," the dean says. "Because you have a yard, I think
> logically that you would have a house."
> "Yes, I do have a house."
> "And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have
> a family."
> "Yes, I have a family."
> "I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must
> have a wife And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you
> must be a heterosexual."
> "I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of

> that because I have a weed eater."
> Excited to take the class now, Jim shakes the Dean's hand and leaves
> to go meet Bob at the bar. He tells Bob about his classes, how he is
> signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic.
> "Logic?" Bob says, "What's that?"
> Jim says, "I'll give you an example. Do you have a weed eater?"
> "No."
> "Then you're a queer."
 
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his phone and calls emergency services. [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies: "Take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]There is a silence, then a shot is heard. [/FONT]
[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"--------good old CANADIAN LOGIC----wanted to borrow an axe from a friend- so he tells me it was his great grandfathers axe. ok so let me borrow the axe. wait he says-- great grand dad bought it new and gave it to my grandfather who put a handle on it when it broke. so when grandpa gave it to my dad ,dad had to put a new head on it because he lost the head splitting wood when it flew off and went into the drink(river). so now i got it and it,s an antique so be careful cause it use to be my great grandfathers axe.. ok see you tomrrow and everything went fine. go figure eh?---ahhh great CANADIAN LOGIC---only in this country---1goose is a goose---2 goose is geese.. 1 moose is a moose- 2 moose is years worth of meat- - applications are now being accepted for firemen in the ARTIC.... and if you take a cold cough drop in a funeral home will that stop the coughin? ....things to ponder in canada.. why don,t they put screen doors on submarines?---AAAHHHHH life goes on hahahahahaha:bwuhaha: take care out there --ORVIL[/FONT]
 
*looks at spring semester class scehduel* Well I'll be damned...logic MWF :bwuhaha:
 

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