69dart340
Well-known member
Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America,
>>Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be
>>referred to as "HILLBILLIES."
>>
>>You must now refer to us as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.
>>
>>
>> And furthermore...
>>
>> HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
>>
>> 1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED
>>AMERICAN."
>>
>> 2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is
>>"VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."
>>
>> 3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."
>>
>> 4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED
>>DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."
>>
>> 5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a
>>"PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."
>>
>> 6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."
>>
>> 7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets
>>"CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED
>>
>> 8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is
>>"MEDICALLY ENHANCED."
>>
>> 9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY
>>REPETITIVE."
>>
>> 10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY
>>EXTROVERTED."
>>
>> 11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is
>>"PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."
>>
>> 12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST
>>PROVIDER."
>>
>>
>>
>> HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
>>
>> 1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a
>>"LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."
>>
>> 2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."
>>
>> 3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES
>>ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."
>>
>> 4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."
>>
>> 5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONAL
>>DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."
>>
>> 6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes
>>"ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."
>>
>> 7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case
>>of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."
>>
>> 8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE
>>EMPATHY."
>>
>> 9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP
>>CHALLENGED."
>>
>> 10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."
>>
>> 11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants
>>- It's "REAR CLEAVAGE"
>
>>Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be
>>referred to as "HILLBILLIES."
>>
>>You must now refer to us as APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.
>>
>>
>> And furthermore...
>>
>> HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
>>
>> 1. She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a "BREASTED
>>AMERICAN."
>>
>> 2. She is not a "SCREAMER" or a "MOANER" - She is
>>"VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE."
>>
>> 3. She is not "EASY" - She is "HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."
>>
>> 4. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a "LIGHT-HAIRED
>>DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."
>>
>> 5. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a
>>"PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."
>>
>> 6. She is not an "AIRHEAD" - She is "REALITY IMPAIRED."
>>
>> 7. She does not get "DRUNK" or "TIPSY" - She gets
>>"CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED
>>
>> 8. She does not have "BREAST IMPLANTS" - She is
>>"MEDICALLY ENHANCED."
>>
>> 9. She does not "NAG" you - She becomes "VERBALLY
>>REPETITIVE."
>>
>> 10. She is not a "TRAMP" - She is "SEXUALLY
>>EXTROVERTED."
>>
>> 11. She does not have "MAJOR LEAGUE HOOTERS" - She is
>>"PECTORALLY SUPERIOR."
>>
>> 12. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a "LOW COST
>>PROVIDER."
>>
>>
>>
>> HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
>>
>> 1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a
>>"LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."
>>
>> 2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is "OVERLY CAUCASIAN."
>>
>> 3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He "INVESTIGATES
>>ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."
>>
>> 4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in "FOLLICLE REGRESSION."
>>
>> 5. He is not a "CRADLE ROBBER" - He prefers "GENERATIONAL
>>DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS."
>>
>> 6. He does not get "FALLING-DOWN DRUNK" - He becomes
>>"ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL."
>>
>> 7. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case
>>of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."
>>
>> 8. He is not a "MALE CHAUVINIST PIG" - He has "SWINE
>>EMPATHY."
>>
>> 9. He is not afraid of "COMMITMENT" - He is "RELATIONSHIP
>>CHALLENGED."
>>
>> 10. He is not "HORNY" - He is "SEXUALLY FOCUSED."
>>
>> 11. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants
>>- It's "REAR CLEAVAGE"
>
