Dear Abbie...

[Fishy]

>>LETTERS DEAR ABBY ADMITTED SHE WAS AT A LOSS TO ANSWER
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>A couple of women moved in across the hall from me.
>>One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a
>>social worker in her mid twenties. These two women
>>go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go
>>into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could
>>be Lebanese?
>>
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>What can I do about all the Sex, Nudity, Foul Language
>>and Violence on my VCR?
>>
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not
>>even sure the baby I'm carrying is his.
>>
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has
>>been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive
>>and I think my boy friend should share half the cost,
>>but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.
>>
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around,
>>and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything
>>and said it would never happen again.
>>
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who
>>was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?
>>
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>I joined the Navy to see the world.
>>I've seen it. Now how do I get out?
>>
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>My forty year old son has been paying a psychiatrist $50.00 an
>>hour every week for two and a half years. He must be crazy.
>>
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he
>>drank until one night he came home sober.
>>
>>
>>(I love this one!!)
>>Dear Abby,
>>My mother is mean and short tempered.
>>I think she is going through mental pause.
>>
>>
>>Dear Abby,
>>You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest
>>in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband lost all
>>interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what do I do?
>>

 

[65furyIII]

Good ones! :bwuhaha:
I could answer at least one:

Dear Abby,
>>I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has
>>been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive
>>and I think my boy friend should share half the cost,
>>but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.


Dear dumb bitch,

Don't approach the subject from the money angle, approach it from the sex angle. Something along the lines of "half the sex or half the cost, your choice" should work

Love,
Abby

 

[dodgechargerfan]

Dear abby, dear abby ...
My feet are too long
My hairs falling out and my rights are all wrong
My friends they all tell me that Ive no friends at all
Wont you write me a letter, wont you give me a call
Signed bewildered

Bewildered, bewildered...

Chorus:
You have no complaint
You are what your are and you aint what you aint
So listen up buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood

Dear abby, dear abby...
My fountain pen leaks
My wife hollers at me and my kids are all freaks
Every side I get up on is the wrong side of bed
If it werent so expensive Id wish I were dead
Signed unhappy

Unhappy, unhappy...

Repeat chorus

Dear abby, dear abby...
You wont believe this
But my stomach makes noises whenever I kiss
My girlfriend tells me its all in my head
But my stomach tells me to write you instead
Signed noise-maker

Noise-maker, noise-maker

Repeat chorus

Dear abby, dear abby...
Well I never thought
That me and my girlfriend would ever get caught
We were sitting in the back seat just shooting the breeze
With her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees
Signed just married

Just married, just married...

Repeat chorus

<John Prine>