dodgedifferent2
hung like a stud field mouse and
An Alberta cowboy was over seeing his herd in a remote mountainous> >>>>>>> pasture when suddenly a brand new BMW advanced out of a cloud of dust> >>>>>>> towards him.> >>>>>>> The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, Ray Ban> >>>>>>> sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy "If> >>>>>>> I> >>>>>>> tell you how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you> >>>>>>> give> >>>>>>> me a calf?"> >>>>>>> The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his> >>>>>>> peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>> The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,> >>>>>>> connects> >>>>>>> to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the> >>>>>>> Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get> >>>>>>> an> >>>>>>> exact fix on his location, which he then feeds to another NASA> >>>>>>> Satellite> >>>>>>> that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man> >>>>>>> then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an> >>>>>>> image processing facility in Hamburg Germany. Within seconds, he> >>>>>>> retrieves an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been> >>>>>>> processed> >>>>>>> and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an> >>>>>>> ODCB> >>>>>>> connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a> >>>>>>> few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a> >>>>>>> full-color,> >>>>>>> 150-page report on his high-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer> >>>>>>> and> >>>>>>> finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows> >>>>>>> and> >>>>>>> calves."> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>> "That's right. Well I guess you can take one of my calves," says the> >>>>>>> cowboy.> >>>>>>>> >>>>>>> He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on in> >>>>>>> amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.> >>>>>>> Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you> >>>>>>> exactly> >>>>>>> what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"> >>>>>>> The young man thinks about it for a second, and then says, "Okay, why> >>>>>>> not?"> >>>>>>> "You work for the Canadian Government," says the cowboy.> >>>>>>> "Wow! That's correct," says the young man, "but how did you guess> >>>>>>> that?"> >>>>>>> "No guessing required," answered the cowboy. "You showed up here,> >>>>>>> even> >>>>>>> though nobody called you; you want to get paid for giving me an> >>>>>>> answer I> >>>>>>> already knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how> >>>>>>> much> >>>>>>> smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about cows. This> >>>>>>> is> >>>>>>> a herd of sheep!!! Now give me back my dog."
